Something happened to me towards the end of this year that "killed" my enthusiasm. I'm still trying to find it again. I like my enthusiasm. It feels good to have passion and life force energy that motivates me to move forward and follow my dreams. I've spent a great deal of time reflecting and learning my "lessons" from this situation. Now I'm ready to gain some momentum and let my enthusiasm fly again.
I know, I know...I'm the ONLY one in my own way. Yes, I get it. So, I'm working hard to get out of my own way and start moving forward again. I've learned my lessons and I'm ready.
What happened? Well, let me attempt to tell my story with respect and be brief. I have a tendency to get too detailed, but I find that gets kinda boring when reading a blog post.
I learned many interesting traditional (as in "from the ancestors") spiritual healing tools and techniques this past year. It has been an amazing experience and has helped me grow, become more conscious and learn to better heal my spiritual, emotional and physical bodies. I have also had the chance to work with others and witness their growth and healing through the use of these tools.
Some of these healing tools resonated more with me than others. Because I found so much personal healing in these ancient, shamanic, traditional ways, I wanted to share with the world so other people could learn and heal also. I guess I got a little overly enthusiastic about sharing with the world at large too quickly. I built a website and signed up to do healing work at an expo and give a talk on my experience with some of the traditional healing tools. I even planned some group meetings and was getting very excited.
Well, the talk and expo actually went really well. The room was full and everyone was interested in what I had to share. I also did a demonstration and a couple people shared how incredible the healing demo was. I felt really good about being able to share this work with others. I also felt very connected to God and felt as though I was on the right path, doing the work I should be doing. I had a few more sessions with people during the day and those also went well. I felt God working through me.
Later I came to understand that my teachers were not quite as enthusiastic about what I was doing as I was. There was a sense of dis-approval. It seems I approached sharing this work in ways that aren't so traditional and may come across to some as more of a "marketing" approach. It was also explained that the certain type of healing work I was doing should not be shared in such a "public" way. Really? I still don't agree with this. We were given permission to do the work at a Cultural center for a health fair, so why not at a holistic healing expo?
I could definitely go deep with this and share on so many levels. One issue is respect for the "traditional ways"....but that is not what this blog is about. Although, I will briefly state that while I do have great respect, times are changing. Why not integrate traditional, ancient healing knowledge into the new age? We have technology that can be used to reach so many more people than we could have ever reached before. We can help each other heal through use of the internet, even if it does have that "marketing" feel. We didn't have this option 40 years ago. Things are changing quickly. And we are moving faster.
Anyway....back to the point. This lack of approval was really rough for me. It triggered the old patterns of needing approval from others to be "worthy". I basically stopped all forward momentum with this healing work. My enthusiasm was gone. Not really gone, just buried somewhere deep. I felt deep sadness, hurt, and anger. I'm not going to go deeper here...but I have done my "work" around these feelings and learned what they are about.
I've been reflecting deeply about how to move forward in the work I want to move forward in and how to do it "correctly". Can I simply do what feels right and true to me? Or do I need to wait for approval or reach a certain level of training or obtain a certificate first? Well, is there really a RIGHT way???? What is right in the eyes of one person may not be right or true in the heart of another.
Ultimately I believe I simply need to follow my heart. I do need to make sure I'm balanced and connected to my heart and my higher self when making decisions. But when I know what is true for me, I have permission from me to move forward with it, to share it, to do what I feel is right. While I know this, it has still been difficult to get past the anger of dis-approval.
Now, this is what has started to shift my dead spirit into feeling more alive and enthusiastic again.... It's going to sound funny, but it's true. The documentary "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead". Have you watched it? Joe Cross made the film. Joe decided to get healthy by juicing for 60 days. It worked! He had so much enthusiasm for his work (and yes, it is healing work) that he shared it with others, made a documentary, and now sells products and support for others to achieve better health through juicing. He has had a couple minor setbacks but is still going strong and even made a second documentary. He has a large following and has inspired and helped many, many people live healthier lives. And he's also made an income from it, which is great!
Here's the thing, Joe does not have a background in nutritional health. He went straight from high school to being a stock broker...and got rich. He doesn't have an education, degree or certification in healing, health, coaching, nutrition, etc. He simply had a passion for getting healthy and decided juicing was the way to do it. Yes, he's done research and talked to experts and shared their information, but he isn't the expert. He simply has enthusiasm and passion!
There is another man in the first documentary. His name is Phil. Phil was inspired by Joe's passion and decided to get healthy by juicing too. He did it. He lost over 200 pounds and started helping others learn how to get healthy by juicing too. He even went through training to become certified in Nutritional Coaching so he could "officially" help others. Well, guess what, Phil's emotions got triggered by an event in his life and he didn't have the support he needed so he ended up gaining all the weight and retreating into depression. I hope he is able to turn his life around again and he certainly inspired many with his initial accomplishments. He is a sweet, awesome guy. But I must say that even when Phil was doing well with juicing and health, I did not see the same enthusiasm and "life force energy" in Phil as I saw in Joe Cross.
So, even though Phil got "certified" it did not make him successful at coaching others. But Joe has been highly successful, in large part because of his great enthusiasm, determination and passion that shines through. I will note that Joe also seems to have better emotional health, or at least has the support to work through emotions as needed. I'm sure that helps him stay strong in his passion. Eating right is one key to good health and high energy, but emotional health is equally important...but that's a completely different topic.
Of course education, training, degrees, certifications, etc are important and necessary at times. But, ultimately, enthusiasm and passion are some of the best drivers for success, in whatever way you want to measure it. You just need to be grounded, centered and believe in yourself!
I'm ready to believe in myself again and let my enthusiasm loose.
Are you ready to believe in yourself?
Much love,
Melanie
 |
| Photograph copyright Melanie Metz 2015 |
